Hey Everyone!
This may sound crazy, but my Family Relation class is over. This week has been crazy because the semester is almost done. I just want to say that I have enjoyed so much this blogging that I may consider keeping it and blog here and there about things I have learned throughout my major. This week in my last class we read about divorces, remarriage, and aging families. As I have said before, I just want to remind everyone that we all have different thoughts or opinions and maybe some experiences that contribute to those opinions, but it is important to be respectful of what others think. Agree to disagree.
Divorce is called to the legal dissolution of a marriage. Divorces can have a big impact on children according to how parents make decisions when they go through these changes. During class time, we discussed how the United States has one of the highest rates of divorces in the world. Usually when a divorce is happening the ones mostly affected by the decision are the children. In the reading, it was mentioned how often children in early ages when their parents are divorcing tend to think that they are the cause of why their parents are having a divorce. Children who live in an environment when they can see their parents fight also could internalize what they are feeling and take the blame. Another interesting fact on divorces is that usually children who see their parents fight all the time if they are in older age to understand what is happening, they can assimilate better why their parents are separating, but the fact to go from one house to another can affect them. They are not having a normal life but there are many things that are being altered due to the dissolution of the marriage.
This week, I was also commenting this with my cousin who experienced something similar about parents fighting and seeing their parent's marriage dissolve. She shared with me how those actions and seeing many fights affected her at the moment she wanted to form a family. It was hard-she said. There were some days that she would think if it was even worthy to keep living because all she could see that a family did was fighting but not offer any solution to the problems. She even wonders if she could change the course of her life due to these events that impacted her as a child in a great way. She also mentioned how to see that her dad started another family and had more children impacted her life in thinking that maybe her mom and her sibling had the fault on making his dad go away. Once she start growing up and understanding more she realized that adults sometimes take decisions without thinking on how much damaged they can make to their children or sometimes for their own good. When she was sharing this, my thoughts immediately turn into what I have been learning in other class about parenting and the way to approach these types of differences in families. In fact, there is one class and something mentioned that could help parents as they are experiencing difficulties which is Parenting classes. I have been in a couple and they teach you more about yourself and who you are as a parent and where you stand than how you need to educate or "change" your child. There are also other ways to support and have a better outcome with your children when it comes to solve problems between couples in a way that is less damage for the children.
Divorces are not easy, but at the same time there are ways to involve less children into the arguments between couples and help them to have a smoother transition. I hope this week's blog can help a little bit better to understand about divorce and with the experience to think more about how we handle situations that can damage our children in one or other way. This may be the last blog in a little while that I will do but big thank you to those of you who take the time to read.
Have a great week and Christmas break!
Nahomy S.
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